Cynical Nation

...but is it progress? Eric at Classical Values informs us of an amazing new product called AWOL (I am not making this up) which allows you to get drunk without drinking.

Basically, it lets you to intoxicate yourself by breathing alcohol vapors. No drinking is involved.

Predictably, the usual assortment of prigs and ninnies are hyperventilating in their opposition to this product, but my complaint is a bit more aesthetic. I can appreciate a good buzz as much as the next person, but this contraption is no substitute for a frosty pint mug of a fine British or American ale.

So why would someone pony up two hundred bills for one of these? I suppose it could be useful for getting drunk without your wife noticing, but aren't there better ways? I mean seriously, doesn't anybody have an ounce of creativity anymore?

I dated this girl once who had to live with her parents for a while during college. Economics forced the move, but she wasn't prepared to give up her hooch. The solution? She used the plastic Mickey Mouse sippy cup that she had as a child. You know the kind, with a plastic lid with a hole for the straw? She'd fill it with vodka and Kool-Aid, sit on the couch, and get quietly hammered while watching Judge Wapner. And of course there's always Jim Treacher's trick involving vodka, green food coloring and an empty Scope bottle for hiding your stash.

Technology can no doubt improve and even revolutionize some hobbies. I'm just not sure drinking is one of them.